So I'm into week two of going to work out. My plan is to go at least three times each week. I've already met that for this week. I'm probably doing four this week! I love the rush that I get. I can go to the gym in a completely bad mood, ready to rip someone's head off, and then afterward, after working out all of that aggression, I'm calm...I'm happy...I'm out of my own head for once. I has really helped my anxiety/depression stuff. Brain chemistry is an interesting thing that way.
I've been really struggling with some things as of late, especially since a few people around me have gotten what I want, but for some reason can't have yet. A couple of people I know are pregnant right now, not by choice. They're young. I wish them all the best, but it has to be hard when you didn't mean for something like that to happen. I'm having a hard time with it I guess because we have been trying for number two for a while now and my body isn't doing what it's supposed to do. I'm getting to the point where my body is starting to work, but it's just kind of a downer for me when someone who wasn't intending what I desire so badly ends up with the result that I want.
Exercising really seems to quell these feelings, that and reading my scriptures. I haven't read for the past few nights, but I need to get back on that. There has to be a reason why I haven't been blessed with a new baby yet. I just wish I knew that reason so that I could know what's ahead for me. Meanwhile, I'm doing everything I can to help my body along. I think the exercise will help. I'm also still taking the medicine to kick start things. The medicine seems to be working, we just haven't had anything take yet. Such is life I guess. I know we're supposed to have more additions to our family. I've felt that. I guess this is Heavenly Father's way of trying to teach me patience. I don't think I'm learning that anytime soon, but I'm trying. I'm trying to remember that things happen in God's time, not necessarily ours.
Here's to waiting in faith...
2 comments:
I know how hard it is to want something so badly, and watch others around you get it. And you might not even feel they deserve it, or they might not even want it. It's very frustrating.
Hang in there! There's gotta be a reason for it. Too bad we can't see the end from the beginning, huh?
Christen
I know what you mean. There are some people who I know right now are pregnant, it was planned, and they've been trying a long time, so I feel wonderfully happy for them. It's just hard when there are others that didn't plan for it and it just happens.
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